Facts Not Feelings

Beliefs are the greatest source of motivation—or the lack of it.

You’re not at the mercy of your feelings; you’re at the mercy of unexamined beliefs and undisciplined actions. Feelings aren’t facts, they’re your interpretation of facts based on what you already believe.

If you want different actions, you have to change the chain: examine your beliefs, interrupt the automatic thoughts they create, allow new feelings to emerge, cultivate more accurate, nuanced emotions, and then behave differently—on purpose.

I’ve worked with clients who believed “I’m terrible with money.” That belief produced thoughts like “What’s the point of budgeting?” which created feelings of anxiety and shame, emotions of helplessness, and actions like avoiding statements and overspending. Once we challenged the belief (“I can learn money skills like any other skill”) and took simple new actions (tracking, small wins), their feelings and emotions shifted—because the story and the behavior had changed.

Your feelings follow your story, and your story follows your beliefs.

Challenge:

This week, catch one unhelpful action and trace it backward: “What was I feeling? What was I thinking? What do I secretly believe here?” Change one belief or one action in that chain—and watch the rest start to move.

Categorized in: General